Bonfire night celebrations

Having sat in the dark on Halloween to avoid the endless stream of kids knocking at the door we can now look forward to bonfire night.

Once again Anston Parish Council is leading the way with a council tax sapping display on the Welfare ground on Monday which thousands will enjoy.

It has become one of the best family events for the natives over the last few years and is well worth making the effort to get down there. The fire will be lit at 7pm, with the fireworks starting at 7.15pm.

The best vantage point is any of the South facing houses on Rackford Road. So my top tip is if you know anyone who lives on that road then make friends with them and keep warm while watching the display.

The identity of the celebrity who will be lighting the fire is once again top secret but rumour has it that 80s pop legend Joe Dolce, who sang the pop classic Shaddap A Your Face has been lined up. Joe now lives on Addison Square and was spotted last week buying some fire lighters from Aldi.

There is much excitement around the village at the moment regarding the Dinno Destroyer. If you haven’t already heard, it is state of the art mega brunch available at our exclusive Indoor Market Café.

The challenge is, can you destroy the destroyer? This food mountain has four sausages, four rashes of bacon, four eggs, two black puddings, beans, tomatoes, mushrooms and four slices of toast. You pay £6.50, but if you manage to destroy it you get half your money back and have your name and photo added to the wall of fame. This particular Dinno Lad will be giving it a bash in the next few weeks once I’ve psyched myself up.

Thought of the week comes from the one and only Decimal Dave. He asks: “Why is it that once you turn 50 you are offered a free parker pen with nearly everything you buy?”

Dinno Lad