Let’s face it, Gainsborough usually has a bit of a Wild West vibe about it doesn’t it?
From the dangerous, crime-ridden streets to the lawless saloons and deserted streets where a passing tumbleweed would be a major event.
I’ve often felt the need to don spurs and holsters and tool up with my two old friends Smith & Wesson before heading out.
And not just after dark, High Noon feels dangerous enough these days.
But I didn’t know what to expect now the hunt is on for a £12k diamond.
If you haven’t heard, Lea, of all places, has become the epicentre in a search for a diamond.
The gem was launched into space by London jewellers 77 Diamonds, thankfully after asking the UK Civil Aviation Authorities (CAA).
It was mounted on a steel frame attached to a helium balloon, and rose above the earth until the atmospheric pressure at the edge of space caused the balloon to pop.
And it landed within a five-mile radius of previously unremarkable Lea.
That means it could be in the garden of any Gainsborough home, nestling amongst the weeds at Gainsborough Central (good luck if it has landed there) or even at the bottom of the Trent.
So when I headed to Lea for a nosey last week I was half expecting it to have been transformed into Gold Rush-era San Francisco.
Gangs of desperadoes wandering the streets seeking an easy fortune, women of questionable virtue outside the pubs and gunfights breaking out whenever a sighting of the gem was rumoured.
But surprisingly the village doesn’t seem to be gripped by diamond fever at all.
Even a £12k gemstone at the bottom of the garden doesn’t seem to get people excited around here.
I suppose there’s a very good chance this diamond will never be found - or it will end up in the hands of some scroat who will pawn it straight away.
I’m certainly yet to see any scuba divers heading down to the depths of the Trent searching for it.
And let’s face it, if they see something glinting down there it’s more likely to be an empty bottle of Tesco Value vodka.