Last week my blog received three website comments...all of them negative.
I realise that not all the feedback I get will be complimentary, that’s part and parcel of being a blogger.
No, I’m not the first person in the world to have a baby but that’s the point, there are 1000’s of women about to enter into and in the midst of becoming a mother for the first time, this blog may just be my perspective but I hope that by writing it and inviting other mums to join in the conversation we can share advice, tips, stories and experiences.
I haven’t only had negative feedback though.
This week I received my first emails from mums who related to last week’s post.
It struck me that the positive responses had all been sent privately and made me think about how we view other mums, their choices and how quick we are to judge.
I read an article this week written by an expectant mum critisising the so called “mummy-braggers” who broadcast their breastfeeding selfies on Instagram and boast of their all-natural, pain relief free births. That these mums make others feel in some way inferior.
I understand that those choices may not suit or even be possible for everyone but why should they make other mums feel less worthy or less successful?
We all make choices, some of them bigger and longer-lasting like whether to breastfeed or bottle feed but surely these decisions are usually based on what we feel is right for us, what we’re comfortable with and what works for the rest of our family.
Don’t we just want our babies to be happy and safe? Whether we choose to breastfeed until they’re 2 or not?
At the other end of the spectrum I’ve read a load of stories recently about breastfeeding mums being asked to stop nursing or being insulted by members of the public for feeding their baby.
As a public breastfeed-er myself I’ve had my fair share of disapproving looks and embarrassed glances!
Personally I think both are wrong, it’s hard enough being a mum, questioning your own choices and trying to discern the difference between people’s positive intent and those that just think you should do it their way.
Shouldn’t we just allow ourselves to be proud of our own choices but equally allow others to be proud too, even if their ideas are radically different to our own?
Have you ever felt judged because of any of your parenting choices? Or is there anything in particular you feel is definitely right or wrong when it comes to raising babies? Get in touch and let me know!
Contact me via my email address: firstname.lastname@example.org or my Twitter account @CescaNaylor.
Read Francesca’s previous blog - click the links below
July 18: The day my life changed forever.
July 25: Its scary but awesome being a mum.